Tag: infidelity

Should

I had something of a ‘Saul on the road to Damascus’ moment the other day. Things are pretty good.  I’m really beginning to feel that my life is mine again, and I am moving on from everything that has happened over the last six years.  I’m learning to accept that it will never be fair, […]

Countdown

After everything we’ve been through with E, I really thought we’d seen it all.  We’ve had a secret marriage, a year of no child support and mortgage defaults, a complete refusal to communicate with me, at all, about anything ever (including messages regarding his child’s mental health crisis), we’re also resigned to the fact that […]

Free

It’s been a weird few weeks (hence the increased blog posts).  In some ways it’s been tough, because a lot of quite traumatic memories have been dragged up, but ultimately, it’s been a time that’s confirmed how far I’ve come and how much better things are for me.  I’ve realised how just happy I am and […]

Witness

I haven’t written about this before because I wasn’t really sure where to start and, as it’s about religion, I was conscious that I could offend. But as we approach another Christmas (I start planning very early), it’s on my mind, and I think enough time has passed to give me some perspective. Basically, the […]

Insanity

There’s a quote that regularly does the rounds on social media.  It’s usually wrongly attributed to Einstein, but it does have an air of his quirky brilliance to it: “the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.” By this definition, the last six years have […]

Own

I think, generally, the kids and I are now in, what I suppose could be called ‘recovery’ from everything that’s happened to us over the last five years.  We’re in a pretty calm place these days and, although, for me, there are clouds on the horizon in the shape of the threat of E withdrawing […]

Shoes

Now things have quietened down, I’m slowly beginning to try to process and make sense of everything that’s happened over the last four years or so.  I’ve found I have very little specific memory of last year, especially last summer.  It’s all a blur  – losing my Mum, agreeing to let E have what he […]

July

July 2020 was a month in which everything in my life changed.  By the end of July, I had moved to a new house, and started a whole new life.  By the end of July, my priorities had shifted forever.  By the end of July, my beautiful Mum, my anchor, my safety, the person my […]

Over

‘Over it’ is a funny term.  It’s kind of an expectation.  A thing that you need to do in order to be able to move on.  It’s supposed to be a liberation.  It can also be a pressure – a mountain to climb, or at least to prove that you’ve climbed When E and I […]

Different

I was thinking the other day about how different and how very much harder my children’s experience of E leaving has been to mine. In the almost three years since E left, I have spent so much time reassuring the kids that he’ll always be their Dad, that’s it’s me he’s left, not them, and […]