It’s been a weird few weeks (hence the increased blog posts). In some ways it’s been tough, because a lot of quite traumatic memories have been dragged up, but ultimately, it’s been a time that’s confirmed how far I’ve come and how much better things are for me. I’ve realised how just happy I am and […]
Tag: christmas
Christmas Spirit
When he realises that the Spirits of Christmas Past, Present and Yet To Come have done their work all in one night, and not over the course of three consecutive days, as originally promised, Ebenezer Scrooge is both surprised and delighted. I love this story, but I always thought that, despite his conversion, at this […]
Down
Sometimes I think the worst thing about what’s currently happening with E is the fact that, after everything he has already put me though, he is finally leeching the joy out of my life. Until now, whilst I’ve had bad days, I’ve generally managed to stay upbeat and positive and have usually kept going with my […]
Old Normal
Watching Youngest Son watch the football the other night, made me realise two things; firstly how much has changed, secondly how little has changed, since E left us. Whilst the kids and I have experienced a seismic shift emotionally, and in terms of our family dynamic, the fact is that in terms of our environment […]
First Christmas
If I’d struggled during Christmas 2016, because I knew about E’s affairs and I knew that we would have to split up, I was equally challenged, although for completely different reasons, by Christmas 2017. We’d faced down a whole year of ‘firsts’ as a family of five, not six, but Christmas was the big one. […]
Gone
The next day was the day we’d agreed that E would get his stuff from the house. I’d booked the kids and I into our favourite restaurant for lunch. I’d told them what was happening and none of them wanted to see him, so off we all went. Whilst we were having lunch, I had […]
Silence
After Christmas and New Year, we had reached a kind of impasse. On the occasions he was home, E barely spoke to me. I was just unable to say anything at all. I don’t know how (and if we ever work it out, I’m sure the kids would pay good money for the secret), but […]
Last Christmas
I wish I could tell you accurately what I said, and what E said, but, by the time I’d summoned up the courage to tell E what I knew, I was drunk. I wouldn’t recommend tackling it the way I did – I was sobbing, stuff just tumbled out. In my defence, the state I […]
Panic
Oldest Daughter was amazing. I told her the truth about what I’d found. She told me that her Dad’s first affair was one of her oldest memories. I explained that after what had happened that I couldn’t see how I could trust him again or how we could stay together, but that I wanted to […]
He-total: Life without Ex 