Damage

One thing that I have been more or less constantly aware of for the last two years is the effect that E and I splitting up has had, and will have, on our children. I grew up in the 70s/80s, a time when children of divorced parents were seen as coming from a ‘broken home’ […]

Nero

Like most children, when I was little I was irrationally scared of ‘monsters’. My personal demons were the monster under the bed, the Cybermen, the Sandman (horrific concept), and (bizarre, I know) the Roman Emperor Nero I can’t remember how I learned about Nero – it may well have been because I was aware of […]

Frozen

I spent the rest of the Friday after E’s CMS bombshell, in shock.  I knew I should be calling the CMS again to find out more about why E had applied for a financial variation, I knew needed to call the Secured Loan Company about the fact that he’d defaulted on the loan (handily a […]

Turn

It’s funny how a day can suddenly change, can suddenly turn from being a beautiful, positive thing, full of potential, into a nightmare.  This happened the day I found out about E’s first affair (we had identical phones, and I picked up his, thinking it was mine, to find hundreds of texts between E and […]

Bigger

I was talking to my Aunt on Tuesday.  As I’ve mentioned on here before, we lost my lovely Uncle last year, and she is at the beginning of the long hard path of learning to live a life without him.  She was saying that she’d seen an illustration about grief, which showed grief as a […]

Humpty Dumpty

“When I use a word,” Humpty Dumpty said, in rather a scornful tone, “it means just what I choose it to mean – neither more nor less.” I’ve spent a lot of the last two years wondering how E would describe his behaviour or behave when confronted with it.  I’ve seen (and quoted) emails he […]

Trust

I’m pleased to report that E has now paid the January installment of Child Maintenance that the Child Maintenance Service asked him for. He’s still not paying anything towards his share of the mortgage, or any maintenance at all for the girls (I receive child benefit for the boys, so the CMS can only arrange […]