Old Normal

Watching Youngest Son watch the football the other night, made me realise two things; firstly how much has changed, secondly how little has changed, since E left us. Whilst the kids and I have experienced a seismic shift emotionally, and in terms of our family dynamic, the fact is that in terms of our environment […]

Single

The subject of if, how, and when I will ever end up dating, or even finding another partner, has become something of a running joke here at Team He Total HQ. Whilst the kids refuse to accept P as anything other than ‘Dad’s girlfriend’ (her legal designation as his wife and their stepmother is too […]

Opinions and Advice

Pretty much since the minute people found out what has happened with E, I have been the recipient of much advice and opinion. Most of it has been good, almost all of it has been sympathetic, but occasionally the comments I received were insensitive, rude or just downright bizarre. As the news about E and […]

Open Letter

I’ve said before that one of the most frustrating things about what’s happened to me, has been the loss of my voice.  In lying to me and about me, in creating a version of me to justify his actions, E robbed me of the ability to defend myself and to tell my truth. I very […]

Married

As August headed into September, Oldest Daugher and I began to plan for what she’d need when she went up to University.  The dining room table began to be heaped with ‘essentials’ – throw covers, cushions, tea light holders, vodka – there wasn’t a single book yet, but I was hoping that they’d soon follow. […]

Results

Just two days after we got back from Singapore was Oldest Daughter’s A Level results day.  I’m not sure who was more nervous about this – me or Oldest Daughter. She was nervous because she needed good grades to get into Durham University (she wanted to read Philosophy there).  I was nervous because I knew […]

Singapore

I know that I’ve made much in this blog about how much I resent E for not just being honest and leaving for good in 2008.  However, there is one thing that takes the edge off that pain.  There is one thing that would never have happened if he had left – Singapore. In 2010, […]