Open Letter

I’ve said before that one of the most frustrating things about what’s happened to me, has been the loss of my voice.  In lying to me and about me, in creating a version of me to justify his actions, E robbed me of the ability to defend myself and to tell my truth. I very […]

Married

As August headed into September, Oldest Daugher and I began to plan for what she’d need when she went up to University.  The dining room table began to be heaped with ‘essentials’ – throw covers, cushions, tea light holders, vodka – there wasn’t a single book yet, but I was hoping that they’d soon follow. […]

Results

Just two days after we got back from Singapore was Oldest Daughter’s A Level results day.  I’m not sure who was more nervous about this – me or Oldest Daughter. She was nervous because she needed good grades to get into Durham University (she wanted to read Philosophy there).  I was nervous because I knew […]

Occam’s Razor

On Saturday I met up with one of my loveliest and best friends for the first time in about three years. We were at University together (she was there at the very beginning of E and my relationship) and whilst we don’t see each other very often, when we do it’s like no time has […]

Clouds

As May and June headed towards July, I began to feel that life was calming down and brightening up a bit – albeit with the odd cloud darkening our days every now and then. At the end of May, after I’d spent the best part of five months asking E to tell his parents what had […]

a foreign country

“The past is a foreign country; they do things differently there.”  – L P Hartley, The Go Between Yesterday I finally did something that I haven’t been able to face doing since E left.  I started re-reading the letters and emails that I had found (and I had written myself) when I discovered E’s first […]

Broken?

Kintsugi – the Japanese art of repairing broken pottery with lacquer dusted or mixed with powdered gold, silver, or platinum.  It treats breakage and repair as part of an object, rather than something to disguise, hide or dispose of. I was recently watching a presentation about the dangers of radicalisation by extremists in schools, colleges and universities.  The presenter […]