I now have a court date – in either a beautiful stroke of irony, or a perfect example of sod’s law, it’s been fixed for my 50th birthday. I guess, it will mark a new beginning, and a new freedom from E, whatever the court decides to do. However, my birthday is at the […]
Tag: cms
Second Wave
I’ve talked a lot on this blog about how I’ve moved on from E and how happy I am that he’s no longer a part of my personal life. Every day gets better and every day I’m happier. However, hand in hand with this, or a side effect of getting emotionally so much better, is […]
Festival
I live in a small town in Bedfordshire called Ampthill. I’m probably biased, but I think it’s an incredible little place. According to a recent survey, it has the best high street in the country for independent retailers, and frankly, it must hold some sort of record for the ratio of pubs and coffee shops […]
Reply
Whilst some things in life are inevitable – death, taxes, and Oldest Son sleeping until 3pm on a Saturday – others are far less likely – things like winning the lottery, Youngest Daughter agreeing with me, or Boris Johnson saying “Ahhh, fuck this, the EU’s amazing actually”. After months of non-communication, I’d long since filed […]
Limbo
One of my favourite Shakespeare plays is Titus Andronicus. It’s a blood soaked, slightly traumatic, play full of decapitated heads and lopped-off hands, and at its centre is Titus’ daughter Lavinia. Raped and then deprived of her hands and her tongue so that she can’t tell anyone who abused her (it takes until the end […]
Victim
“You will never get the truth out of a Narcissist. The closest you will ever come is a story that either makes them the victim or the hero, but never the villain” Shannon L Alder I’ve lost count of the number of times the term ‘narcissist’ has been offered up to me as an explanation […]
Envy
I’ve never been an envious or jealous person. In fact, I often wonder if I had been a bit more jealous and possessive if E might have realised he was with someone who loved and valued him and been less tempted to have affairs. Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t change myself for anything, but […]
CMS
As E’s refusal to pay any child maintenance until legally forced to do so continues into its seventh month, I am finding myself swinging between two emotional extremes. I have whole days where I feel unnaturally calm – I have an assurance that in the end everything will be ok, that this too will pass […]
Home
My stay in hospital ended up taking two days and two nights and involved two blood transfusions and an iron infusion all of which took hours to seep into my bloodstream. I’d only ever experienced a hospital stay when my children were born, and back then I was so in love with my tiny new […]
A&E
By 10.30, I was sat in A&E waiting to be admitted. As I looked round the waiting room at my fellow patients, who included one woman ominously slumped over a pink bucket, a young man with a bloody nose, a pale, tearful, woman sitting opposite me, and a wheelchair-bound older chap who was cheerfully singing […]
He-total: Life without Ex 