When we moved to Singapore the first proper storm we experienced – at 3am – resulted in a Sound of Music-esque scene, where, with each fresh crash of thunder, a different child ran barefoot into my room and threw themselves under my duvet. For those first few months my bed became a place of sanctuary […]
Tag: affairs
Grenades
I’m breaking with this blog’s usual ‘timeline’ to interject with something that happened today. I wanted to mark it, diarise it, write about it whilst it was fresh. So far, this blog has been retrospective, and I’ve had months to calm down and try to put things in perspective before writing, but today provided an […]
Aftershocks
If E leaving and all the stuff surrounding it, was the initial earthquake, then I suppose I should have expected some aftershocks. One of the things that constantly surprises about this whole thing has been how long it is taking me to ‘get over it’, and how hurt I have been by it. I know […]
First Day
In what would be a year of Firsts after E left, I think my first day at work in 19 years was one of the most daunting. I had literally been at home since September 1998. I was used to my own company, my own rules. I was used to silence and my own space. […]
Dark Hours Symphony
It’s a very long time since I did O’ Level music (the fact that it was an O’ Level, not a GCSE, is indicative of exactly how long), but it occurred to me the other night (when I was wide awake, obvs) that my Dark Hours Anxiety has a particular pattern and follows an almost […]
Things I miss
I was just thinking that this blog has been a tad a bit Anti-E so far. Whilst I’m sure most of you (especially my Mum) are now saying ‘Well….Duh!”, I did think it was slightly unfair to be totally negative about him and thought that maybe I should redress the balance? There were *some* good […]
Him
I’ve written about P here, but, really, she’s sort of irrelevant. E would have done what he did with another student if she hadn’t been there. But what about E? What do I think about E? The answer might seem obvious and rather sweary, but actually, it’s a tricky one. I visited a solicitor not […]
Success
In lots of ways Sober March was going quite well. I was walking 3-4 kilometers a day, I was making sure I ate loads of fruit and vegetables (ever one for a challenge, I’d set myself a target of 10 portions a day, just to see if it was possible) and, whilst I was still […]
In defence of blogging
One of the questions I’ve been asked several times since starting this blog is ‘why discuss this so publicly?’. It’s a fair question. Whilst I’m very open and honest (ask me a straight question about my personal life, I’ll usually give an straight answer) I’m actually quite a private person. I’m on Facebook a lot, […]
Family Ties
One of the things I was really worried about when E left was what would happen to my relationship with his family. They had been a big part of my life, for over half of my life, and they were very much a part of my kids’ lives. To be honest, E had always been […]
He-total: Life without Ex 