“He’s moved in with P.” I had already learned to dread Saturdays. All four kids would be over-emotional and highly strung before E arrived and after the boys had gone the house felt resentfully quiet. Then, when they got home, not only would Youngest Son be unsettled and prone to tears but the inevitable comments […]
Aftershocks
If E leaving and all the stuff surrounding it, was the initial earthquake, then I suppose I should have expected some aftershocks. One of the things that constantly surprises about this whole thing has been how long it is taking me to ‘get over it’, and how hurt I have been by it. I know […]
First Day
In what would be a year of Firsts after E left, I think my first day at work in 19 years was one of the most daunting. I had literally been at home since September 1998. I was used to my own company, my own rules. I was used to silence and my own space. […]
Dark Hours Symphony
It’s a very long time since I did O’ Level music (the fact that it was an O’ Level, not a GCSE, is indicative of exactly how long), but it occurred to me the other night (when I was wide awake, obvs) that my Dark Hours Anxiety has a particular pattern and follows an almost […]
Things I miss
I was just thinking that this blog has been a tad a bit Anti-E so far. Whilst I’m sure most of you (especially my Mum) are now saying ‘Well….Duh!”, I did think it was slightly unfair to be totally negative about him and thought that maybe I should redress the balance? There were *some* good […]
Cultural Differences?
I’ve written about P here, but, really, she’s sort of irrelevant. E would have done what he did with another student if she hadn’t been there. But what about E? What do I think about E? The answer might seem obvious and rather sweary, but actually, it’s a tricky one. I visited a solicitor not […]
Him
I’ve written about P here, but, really, she’s sort of irrelevant. E would have done what he did with another student if she hadn’t been there. But what about E? What do I think about E? The answer might seem obvious and rather sweary, but actually, it’s a tricky one. I visited a solicitor not […]
Success
In lots of ways Sober March was going quite well. I was walking 3-4 kilometers a day, I was making sure I ate loads of fruit and vegetables (ever one for a challenge, I’d set myself a target of 10 portions a day, just to see if it was possible) and, whilst I was still […]
Kids
By Mid-March I had begun to realise that as far as the kids were concerned, I was it. There wasn’t anyone else anymore. Whilst I’m sure he’d help if he could, E had moved over forty miles away. Neither his family nor mine were local. I had lots of amazing, incredibly supportive, friends who would […]
In defence of blogging
One of the questions I’ve been asked several times since starting this blog is ‘why discuss this so publicly?’. It’s a fair question. Whilst I’m very open and honest (ask me a straight question about my personal life, I’ll usually give an straight answer) I’m actually quite a private person. I’m on Facebook a lot, […]
He-total: Life without Ex 